Conan inspired furniture line

Posted on April 1st, 2020 01:00 AM EST

Inspired by the survival game Conan Exiles and the work of Robert E. Howard, Funcom is proud to reveal the upcoming launch of CÖNAN, a furniture line set out to improve the quality of life for people who are now stuck in their homes.

“I came up with the idea when we first started working from home,” says Joanna Leading, head of the Funcom Furniture Department. “With three kids running around the house, I found it excessively hard to focus on my job.

Then it struck me: What if I built my kids a pillory and just parked them in front of the TV?” Miss Leading says the results were instantaneous. “I now know where my kids are 24/7. They can still play videogames and even eat while using the pillory. And I think they enjoy the peace and quiet we now have at home. I know I do.”

In addition to the pillory, Funcom has revealed a further three products in its upcoming furniture line.

With the new CÖNAN NANNY, you’ll be able to work from home without having to worry about what your kids are up to.

WHEEL ÖF PAIN is used in Conan Exiles to break your captives into submission. While Funcom cannot guarantee this to be possible with the new life-sized version, the WHEEL OF PAIN is an excellent tool for home exercise. Even the construction of this build-it-yourself device will provide you with quite a workout. The WHEEL OF PAIN can be easily adjusted to accommodate children and pets.

TÖRTUR is a brand-new home stretching device, perfect for relaxing your muscles after a session on the WHEEL ÖF PAIN. As an added benefit, TÖRTUR can also serve as a fashionable dining table.

THRÖNE is the perfect chair to go with your new dining table, and a great way to show your post-quarantine dining guests who’s boss.

With the purchase of any two items, Funcom will also throw in an extra LIGHTING RÖD, free of charge. The LIGHTING RÖD is a stylish smartphone speaker, inspired by one of the famous features of Conan Exiles.

The exact date of launch has not yet been determined, but you can check out this video for more information and a further glimpse into what awaits you.

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